Author Archives: Van Redd
What the Hell Happened: Cartoon Edition
What the hell happened to cartoons? If you pursue a standard saturday morning line up in the U.S right now you are going to find a lot of steaming piles of animation. Remember the days of really imaginative stuff like Thundercats, G.I. Joe, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? I know these things were basically created to sell a toyline but, at least at first, it seemed that writers actually cared about crafting something.
Even later on when Pokemon dominated the air waves it still was a coherent show that had a decent lesson or two each week about friendship. Now more and more we are seeing a decline not only in quality, but in production at all. The rising costs are leaving future generations out to dry. I know, I know that kids can watch Boomerang and see all the old stuff…but I want to discover something new with a son or daughter someday.
Everything today is so sequel and remake focused and the spirit of originality is all but gone now. I have graduated to some decent animes but, it’s just not the same sometimes.
Retro Rocket: Final Fantasy VII
So many things have been said over this game that it is hard to find a new spin to put on it, that being said I am just going to talk from the heart on this one. I found Final Fantasy VII by accident. I had always been a fan of the U.S. releases of Final Fantasy back when it was always on Nintendo. I loved both Final Fantasy 4 and 6 with all my heart. Between Resident Evil 2 and Final Fantasy VII I was finally convinced to save up my money to get a PlayStation, to this day it remains one of the best purcahses I ever made.
I am not going to bother to bore you with a review of FF 7. The internets are littered with them and they have been done by far better then me. What I will do is tell you why, no matter how many times the game is called overrated, I will always love it. Final Fantasy VII had a mood to it. From the characters, the settings, and especially the music everything coalesced to make you just feel what it was like to be in the world of Cloud, Barret, and Tifa. By today’s standards the graphics are terrible but at the time they were mind-blowing. The places I went in the game felt real no matter how fantastic they were.
Speaking of music, I don’t think a FF game has ever had a better soundtrack. At every single turn in the story the music sets the tone. From joy to heartache and from mystery to romance the music is center stage. It is no small tribute to the soundtrack that FF7 is one of the most remixed soundtracks ever.
Say what you will about melodrama, the characters of FF7 have stuck with me. I still feel the plight of Cloud when he returns home to his small town only to not find his mother, or of Aerith and her quest to find her place in the scheme of things. Final Fantasy 7 is close behind 6 in terms of remember-able characters that stick with you.
With the game being on the PSN store, I highly encourage you to try it out for yourself. Forgive the now outdated graphics and just play it for what it is, you will enjoy it.
Van Redd Reviews: Limbo
Darkness and Light are two of the simplest forms of artistic expression, and yet for all time they have been the most powerful. The subtext is easy to understand…quite primal in fact. Limbo plays to this strength and is one of the most haunting games I have ever played.
Haunting is quite apt as your character, a young boy, looks like a lost spirit. His form is black save for his dots of light eyes. The world he traverses through is a mix of shadow and light, the forms of trees and buildings just faintly apparent. From the very beginning you feel as if things are not right. You are made to feel weak and helpless; one hit will send you to your doom. Death lurks at every corner in this world and can come at you unexpectedly. From a huge spider and brain controlling slugs to environmental hazards like electric lines and buzz-saws. Each death is a very VERY gristly end for your little companion.
Limbo is actually a rather simple platformer. The controls are as simple as it gets; you use one button to run, one to jump and one to activate/push/pull. While this seems easy the trick to this game is in how devious the game becomes in timing what to do with when to do it. Limbo requires you to be creative and think outside of the “Mario Box”. You will not be jumping on enemies heads, instead you must lure them into traps, avoid them, or take advantage of a weakened foe.
Later in the game you will face devious gravity puzzles, be required to backtrack, and your brain will be stretched to figure out just how to get to your goal. Your goal, though, is not made very clear. You get a small indication that you are after a girl, your sister according to promotional materials. You are never told how you came to be in the forest; actually your never told anything. There are no cutscenes to really speak of, no dialogue, and no text to read. A highly subjective ending awaits you that I will in no way spoil, all I can say is that you will have to make your own mind up about this story of this game even more so than in Braid.
I was able to power though this game in a marathon six hour session, so be aware that this is not a game that is going to take up a huge amount of 
time. I do not regret it and I do need to go back though and pick up some of the hidden orbs you can find. While I do enjoy the art style and minimalist approach, it does feel this was made as a “games are art” game merely for the sake of it.
BOTTOM LINE: While Limbo is a exciting, beautiful, and haunting experience the price tag is rather high. I totally recommend playing it but be aware that your only going to get about seven total hours of this game unless your into replaying it again and again.
Retro Rocket: Resident Evil 2
In all the years I have been playing games there has not been a game I anticipated more than Resident Evil 2. I was a big Nintendo fan back in the day and did not immediately buy into the PlayStation when it first came out. After a few late night sessions with the original Resident Evil at a friend’s house though, I worked my butt off at a crappy retail grocery job to save up the funds to get a PS before RE2 came out. I actually remember reading gaming magazines on my breaks at work that talked about the game and just dreaming of what it would be like.
When it finally came out I went to Wal-Mart, money in hand, and then walked out with a brand new PlayStation and the game. It is one of my happiest gaming memories. I remember rushing home and hurriedly ripping open the box to hook up everything up. I had even made sure to schedule the next day off so I could have maximum time with the game. I put a lot of effort into getting to play RE2 and oh…oh how I was not disappointed. I can never tell you the sheer amount of hours I have put into RE2 but I can tell you that all you have to do is mention the game and I can hear various pieces of the soundtrack in my mind.
What set RE2 apart from it’s previous game was scale. Everything was bigger in this game. In RE1 you fought your way though a mansion, in RE2 you fight your way though a city, a police station, a sewer, and 
more. The police station alone was easily as big if not bigger then the entire mansion. Instead of two or three zombies on screen you could have huge packs of them. You can get backed into a corner really quickly and the game likes to keep the pressure on. Unlike the first game you discover VERY early on there is more to the outbreak than zombies and you are kept on edge with fewer breather moments. The best example of this is the very beginning of the game. Rather then place you in a safe mansion hall, you start on a burning street in the middle of a pack of zombies.
RE2 also differs in tone from the first game. While both are video game equivalents to B-movie or George Romero type zombie movies, the first game is more like a mystery while this one is more of a thriller. That tone is set from the start as the goal quickly becomes just to find a way out with all other goals fading to the background. In every room you can see turned over furniture, strewn papers, phones off hooks, and other signs that only a short time ago horrible things were happening as people faced their end.
The music in this game also adds a layer of tension. It is somber, disheartened, and sad. It enforces the tense and desperate situation your in. It only lets up rarely when you meet with your comrades again, but the dark atmosphere ramps back up when your forced to go it alone. Sound actually plays an important role in the game. Each enemy has it’s own distinct sound so if you listen you can tell what is around the corner..and shudder in fear when you realize your dealing with a huge pack of zombie dogs. I can remember climbing down a ladder and walking a bit, then hearing the pitter-patter sound of paws and cursing.
RE2 delivered on every level for me and to this day stands as the benchmark game of the series. Every other game has had to compare itself to this one. You will not 
find more game for your money then or now. Thanks to it’s “zapping” system each character had their own disc. Depending on what order you played them in significant elements in the story would change. Leon A / Claire B would be a very different experience than Claire A / Leon B. Also, playing Leon first and making certain decisions could help or hinder Claire during her game and vice verse. While each character’s B game sent you to basically the same places but in a different order, it added a new boss and quite a few totally new areas. Actually, only by playing though an A then B scenario could you even see the true ending of the game. In addition to that there were two unlockable mini-games you could play if your game Ranking was high enough. In later versions a third mini-game was even added.
Resident Evil 2 was one of the best looking games during the original PlayStation era. I know it does not hold up against the newer games but if you have never played it, please find a way to. It is a very important game in the history of gaming and one you should say you have played.
Van Redd Reviews: Crackdown 2
If you can’t guess Crackdown 2 is the sequel to the original Crackdown. Unlike the original this game does not have a Halo Beta to coast on for sales, not to mention a lot of behind the scenes drama over it’s development. You see Crackdown 2 was not developed by Real Time Worlds, they are too busy with making A.P.B a massively multiplayer failure. Instead, Ruffian Games picked up the slack but only after Microsoft seemed to flip flop on making the game to begin with.
Ok now that the history lesson is over with let’s get down to the nitty gritty truth. Crackdown 2 is really just an upgraded Crackdown 1 with a few additions and oddly a few subtractions. While you lose vechiles that chagne as your driving skill improves, you gain helicopters, pinging for orbs (like Infamous), and a niffty wing suit to glide around in. Gone are a series of gangs and bosses to fight, they are replaced by a terrorist group known as Cell. A second antagonistic faction are the Freaks, the mutants who come out during the cover of night. The main crux of the game is to power up beacons to destroy these Freaks. You do this by taking over things called Absorbtion Units that are scattered thoughout Pacific City. You have to usually power up three of them in an area before you can do a beacon misson, which are bascially the “boss” fights of the game.
Ok, let’s be honest. The game is very repetitive, almost insanely so. Having played games enough I can see why Ruffian went with this model of gameplay. Someone can drop in your game at anytime and not miss out really anything. A player can drop in your game and know what they need to do with no real backstory needing to be explained. If you drop into a Coop game of Gears you could be at any point in the story and have no clue what the hell is going on, not so in Crackdown. Now I am NOT saying I agree with this choice, merely that I kind of see what they were thinking.
Speaking of repitiion, you will recognize most places as you are in the same old Pacific City. Now to be fair the city is ten years older and much MUCH worse for the ware. Buildings are in flames and/or falling over, most sections are warzones, and after dark a sea of mutants roam the streets for blood. Many will deride Ruffian for copy and pasting the city, but if you played the first game it is kind of neat to see how the city has changed. I think they should have done a lot more to make the city feel different, but in and of itself being in the same city is not a deal breaker at all.
The dealbreaker for this game is all in how you intend to play it. If you intend to play this game mainly as a single player game you will HATE it. It is repetitive, boring, and devoid of engagement with you. If you have a good group of friends to play Co-op with, you are going to have a really great time. The saving grace of this game is just how much fun it is to gang up with three other friends (double the last game’s number) and cause as much havoc as you can. Lonely orb hunts become treasure hunts with friends. Having someone to talk and goof around with really is a huge amount of fun and has kept me going back long after I completed the game.
The game is not without a large share of bugs, which to be fair all sand box games are. My friends and I have run into numerous bugs with most of them being centered around the helicopter. I have had it explode for no reason on the helipad to a being on it when a friend took off and it appearing in my game that we were still sitting on the pad. I have had abilities seemingly not level up only to leave the chopper to gain a new level. I have struggled to make my agent climb up to a hidden orb on a tricky ledge only for him to decide to ignore me so he can fall to his death. I have even had a friend get knocked into a type of first person mode which is how we got this choice gameplay shot.
Bottom Line: I honestly think Crackdown 2 would have benefited from being a $40 game. If you are more of a solitary gamer, or if your friends don’t plan on getting this game then you are better off renting. If you know that some of your friends are getting it then I feel good about recommending it to buy. Just goofing off with some buddies has been some of the best times on LIVE I have had. Just know what you really want out of the game before you commit to anything.
Ryan Reynolds’ Green Lantern Suit!
Here is the cover of Entertainment Weekly with the first image of Ryan Reynolds as Green Lantern. Supposedly the suit is mostly CGI and when you think about the source of GL’s power that seems to make sense. I’m a bit torn on it as we are seeing him here out of context, but I do kind of dig the suit. A lot of people are not sure Ryan is the best choice to be Hal Jordan, and that may be valid. However one of the orignal problems with Hal, and why he was replaced for years by Kyle Rayner, was that he was sort of boring in the same way Cyclopes from X-Men is. Reynolds may be able to breath some real life in to Hal, and as long as his GL does not turn into a green Deadpool I am willing to give him a chance.
Back to the Futurama!
Futurama has been back as a seires for a few weeks now and so far it has been pretty good. I was worried as the movies, while having their moments, felt forced and never really went in the right directions. Here is a rundown of the latest episodes if you have missed them:
Rebirth: The gang gets reborn, but something is very wrong with Leela.
In-A-Gadda-Da-Leela: Leela and Zap Brannigan try to save Earth from a deadly sphere of death from space (that is in no way the Death Star). They find themselves stranded and alone….and in love?
Attack of the Killer App: Fry and the gang get eyephones and start posting on Twicher. Bender and Fry get into a bet on who can get the most followers, but the evil Mom seems to be behind the new social media. Also, a shocking secret about Leela gets revealed.
Proposition Infinity: Kif is sick of Amy’s constant flirting with “bad boys” and dumps her. While putting herself back out on the market for a guy Amy falls for Bender’s bad boy ways. When other members of society are shocked and angered by their “robosexuality”, Bender and Amy go about raising awareness of why their love should be allowed to thrive.
The DUH-Vinci Code: Professor Farnsworth leads the team on a misson to uncover the secret of the last invention of his hero Leonardo DaVinci. Fry struggles with the knowledge that not only does everyone think he is stupid…that he actually IS stupid. Following the clues the Planet Express crew uncovers a shocking secret about Leonardo.
The show has been nailing it so far. The only episode I have not liked was “In-A-Gadda-Da-Leela” as it just felt like a forced way to get Zap and Leela together for one episode. The other episodes are great with “Proposition Infinity” and “Attack of the Killer App” being quite strong. The best thing I can say about the new season is that it feels like the old show, whereas the movies did not.
Final Fantasy XIII: A story in pictures!
Hey there champ! Did you just get your brand new copy of Final Fantasy XIII for your system of choice? Well you’re in for a time buddy let me tell you! Did you know you can break down the average user experience of someone who plays Final Fantasy XIII into six simple stages? Let’s take a look at them now!
STAGE ONE: Happiness (Hours 1-5)
Here you are fresh from your store of choice. You just spent a hefty chuck on of change or traded in some really treasured games on FF. You loved all the others…even Nine…hell even Final Fantasy X2. You sit down and open up your system and with trepidation and excitement you put in your disc. The game loads up and you begin. You’re first few hours are really slow and seem odd but hey, your just getting started and a little hand holding is expected right? I bet your thinking it’s going to pick up really soon.
STAGE TWO: Confusion (Hours 6-20)
Well you would be wrong! In fact, dead wrong! You’re going to be going straight hallway after straight hallway with only two members of your team for a long…long…LONG time. Oh and you best get used to nothing making a bit of sense. You see in past Final Fantasy games too much time was wasted on explaining things like plot…or why the characters decide to take the actions they take. FFXIII is far to concerned with making speeches that don’t really make sense but try to illicit emotional responses that are unearned.
STAGE THREE: Anger (Hours 21-55)
At this point your getting pretty steamed. Even though the game was nice enough to give you a small bit of fun when you finally get to do some side missions, your fleeting joy saddens when you realize that eventually your going to have to go back to the pointless story. They combat is so fun, yet they never give you a break from it so you can savor it and take a breather. The characters you enjoyed at first, then later put up with, are now gnawing on your last nerve with their stupid stupid over dramatic dialogues.
STAGE FOUR: Hate (Hours 55-85)
You get to the end of the game and have had enough. The harsh realization that your never getting all of that $60 back begins the eroison of your soul that the idiot characters chip away at all though the game. Things you like about the game fade, like the combat, fade into the mist of your white hot rage. You have had enough of Snow whining like a bitch, enough of Vanille sounding like she has diarrhea every battle, and you certainly can’t take any more jackassery from the plot that refuses to go anywhere.
STAGE FIVE: The Reckoning (HOURS N/A)
You are now a slavering beast. Things like conscious though, showers, and hygiene are meaningless in your new world of blind venomous rage. You slam on the eject button, rip the DvD (or Blu-Ray) out and proceed to do things to it, that if it were a person, would land you some serious jail time. Your at the point that you print photos of the characters just so you can burn them and stomp them to bits of ash.
STAGE SIX: Catharsis (HOURS N/A)
The evil vanquished at last you begin to go about your life again. You will never be what you once were. The scars will always sting. You have been forced to bear a greater weight then even Frodo. Your only recourse is to clense your spirit wish something that can sooth your pain, but only one thing can make you believe in good JRPGs again…..
The Greatest Movie Trailer Ever Made?
Let’s be honest guys, action movies have not been what they used to be. Gone is the sense of balls out adventure and bigger then life heroes. Now we settle for Adrian Brody and Topher Grace playing footsies with Predators. We get dragged to see shlock like Twilight and Sex and the City and all the time ask ourselves where did our awesome movies go?
They went here.
*Warning: mildly unsafe for work, be sure to turn the sound down.
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